Well, us poor/tight Northerners, you know, I was assuming more like £5 a head.

What about the legal position? According to my deeds I can't use the house for any business other than a doctor's surgery. Charging money for attendance makes it a public performance, doesn't it? Licences? What about fire escapes? What about parking in the neighbourhood? If you appease the neighbours by offering them free tickets that's your take down significantly.

Maybe hold it outdoors and claim it's a barbeque? It might work on Club Day when there are a lot of private parties being thrown. Except that the noise from the fair would drown out the performer, so that's out.

First requirement: move to big house in country - but not too far out.

Alternatively - speak to Farmer John about the use of his barn.....