Heard it several years ago on Eric McEwen's show from Charlottetown [prior to Evans & Doherty]. Believe it was written and sung by Denis Allen; think Eric said he was a cousin of Dennis Ryan's. This is as I learned it and have sung it; can't vouch for accuracy: CHORUS: They tell me that lovin' will never be mine. Go on out o' that, I got plenty o' time. Come from a long disting-u-ished line Of late starters in love. Me father was sixty when he met me ma, Seventy-one when she fin'lly said "yah" Saturday night comin' home from a fleadh. They married the very next mornin'. 1. I've heard them say that love is blind. So all o' me life I've been lookin' behind, Sometimes goin' out o' me mind, Searchin' for someone to love. I treats ‘er right when I take ‘er out, Chicken an' chips and a gallon o' stout. I know what courtin' is really about, And I can't understand why I'm single. 2. So, all you ladies there in distress Give Life-Line a call. They have my address. Drop me a line and I'll do the rest, And all your worries are over. And always remember an acre of land Is better than havin' some sod on yer hands, Fifteen kids, none o' them planned And him supportin' a brew'ry. 3. They're over in Europe changin' the laws. Maybe they'd like to put in a clause Tellin' the world we are no daws Just because we're near sixty. ‘Cause lately, I notice a lack of response When me and the lads turn up at a dance, Yelpin' an' shoutin' an' stompin' the floor. You'd think they'd be happy to see us.
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