Hi, I'm Zeno, an ancient philosopher born in 488 BCE (cept I didn't know it was BC at the time) in Velia, Italy. When I was 40, me and my pal Parmenides went to Athens to see what kind of trouble we could get into. We heard there was a pretty good folk scene there, but found none of it. I worked as a philosopher for a while, but it didn't pay very well and everything I said turned out to be bullshit, so I packed up my lute and lyre and hit the road. Some said I died in a fight for freedom against tyrants, but I was just asleep.
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