13-- Dogs depress me. I think it's because people don't deserve that kind of unconditional love. I want to say, Spot, you could do a lot better. Plenty of fish in the sea. Dog-owners piss me off because they think nothing of setting loose their lovable pit-bull at a children's playground.

14. With two small children climbing me, I once told a stranger that I would kill his fucking dog in a just a moment and then beat him with the carcass.

15. I was a paperboy, and The Paperboy is one of my favorite children's books.

16. I think Blair Witch 2 is one of the most awful pitiful unschooled and crass rip-off less-than-uninspired things I've ever seen, but I can't manage to think less of Peg, who seems so utterly cool, for having written a scene of it.

17. I've now watched exactly one ball game in my life.