Stupid questions asked of me when I worked at Disney World 1985-87:

What time is the 3 o'clock parade?

Is the rain real?

Are the birds real?

Are the horses real? (usually asked after one drops a load - the horse, not the tourist)

How do you make it rain?

When do the pirates take their break?

Can the Monorail drop me off in front of the Castle? (This is asked from a location where it can be clearly seen that there is no Monorail track anywhere near the Castle.

Why don't you have a Southern accent?

Which park do you go to when you're on vacation?

My friend Bill works in EPCOT, do you know him? (this in a company with over 30,000 employees at the time)

(While standing in the Magic kingdom) Where's the Magic Kingdom?

Where is Disneyland?

Where are the Sea World toys?

Where is Shamu?

How will I find my car if I didn't think to remember where it was?

and the ultimate question, AND I SWEAR a fortyish man asked me this:

Is Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?

pax yall