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User Name Thread Name Subject Posted
GUEST,daylia BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea? (34) RE: BS: Fancy condoms - Are they a stupid idea? 04 Aug 05


All condoms are a stupid idea, fancy or not. Why? Well...

1. They interfere with spontaneous hedonism. And there's nothing more pleasing than an occasional bout of spontaneous hedonism!

2. They rip and tear and fall off more often than not, and usually at the most inopportune moments. In other words - THEY DON'T WORK very well at all!

3. Using 'em is about as much fun, and effective, as taking a shower in your raincoat and hipwaders.

4. When teenage folk in parked cars are through with them, they inevitably throw them on the ground (so Mama will never know). This makes for the most unpleasant sight next morning. People out walking hafta make wide circles around them for months, if not years on end. There's been one on the ground at the baseball park for about 2 years now - no-one will pick it up! The pretty pink stripes have faded and the ribbs are all busted, but it's still intact. Bubbly too.

It's quite the challenge explaining these things to curious young children. (Wherever did you find that disgusting thing??? No it's NOT a balloon! DROP IT ... hey, GET IT OUT OF YOUR MOUTH RIGHT NOW! ;-)

And when innocent endangered birds and animals mistake them for limp deflated worms or snakes, they choke. And croak. Now I ask you ... is THAT fair?????

I've said my peace. ANd now I'm going to get some. TTYL


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