Good morning; we hope your night was restful.
Mr. S. Turtle regrets that he was unable to join and enliven the pondside party on the night prior to the departure of those thoughtful enough provide entertainment to all of us until dawn on their final night with us. He believes that his participation would have made a major difference in the outcome of the moonlit nude water polo game.
The Committee wishes to inform you that the following policies have been instated for water facility users.
1. Only non-motorized craft are allowed on the pond. We have confiscated the jet ski that was left by the swimming area. If you wish it rerurned you must inform us of your insurance carrier. Ms Beaver is still in the ICU. The Kits became a bit upset and opened the dam. The jet ski is now in non-working condition but must be removed from the base of the waterfall before winter. Mr. Moose can be contracted to arrange this operation.
2. The slide near the swimming area is restricted to responsible users. Careless use of said slide caused several near misses on members of the committee. Fortunately no one was injured. All further scares will dealt with an appropriate manner.
3. All young must be supervised. Ms. Otter has informed the committee that several campers have neglected to take their young with them upon departure. In the event of their reappearance, parents will be billed for food and supervision, as well as reeducation. All expenses incurred will be billed to the appropriate adult account. In the event of account closure, our more urban associates will come and reason with you. All medical bills will be charged directly to your accounts. You can work with your insurance carrier to straighten out the matters.
Most respectively submitted and
The Campground Committee