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User Name Thread Name Subject Posted
GUEST,282RA BS: Cheney Assumes Presidency (69* d) RE: BS: Cheney Assumes Presidency 21 Jul 07

I had a dream last night about them finding more polyps up Bush's ass. While trying to remove them, Bush goes into a violent seizure and dies. Thoroughly frightened at the thought of Cheney being president, doctors frantically work to remove the polyp which contains all of Bush cognitive functions. They bathe it in a solution and pack it in ice and have it flown on Air Force One back to the Oval Orifice. They hook it up to a special machine with a loudspeaker on it. After a few tense moments, during which Cheney looks like he's going to shit his pants, they suddenly hear tumbling from the loudspeaker: "Now it's a particularly heavy task--especially in the world--because there's those who don't believe that because your skin is brown or your religion is Muslim that you can't self-govern."

A huge cheer erupts from the doctors as they joyously embrace and high-five one another. Cheney stands there clearly enraged and despairing but slaps his disturbing half-leer on his kisser and praises Halliburton for the technology that provided the ice that preserves President Bush-Polyp.

That night, the nation watches anxiously as their television screens show a microphone in front of a loudspeaker attached to a portable cooler. Surely, this is not THEIR president. Certainly Cheney has taken over the government. O woe to us! they cry. When suddenly they hear: "In my judgment, when the United States says there will be serious consequences, and if there isn't serious consequences, it creates adverse consequences." A collective sigh of relief is heard hanging above the nation.

Cheney will challenge the legitimacy of a presidency run by an ass-polyp that is probably cancerous. But the Supreme Court throws the case out. The majority (and, in fact, unanimous) opinion of the court being that the people believe that even if Bush is just a nonsense-talking cancerous ass-polyp he's still better than Cheney.

Moral: Even if Bush is just a nonsense-talking cancerous ass-polyp he's still better than Cheney.

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