Tsk, Dave! I thought I was wimpy, but I have at least eaten deep-fried jalapenos, jumped off a garage roof and dozens of tall trees into snowbanks, and even drunk (if not chugged) an entire handle bottle of rye whisky with a friend. (Beats chest and gives Tarzan yell.)

By the way: do the rye whiskey thing if A: you want to experience the sensation next morning of your brain being a dried pea rattling about in the charred cavern of your skull, and B: you wish to cure yourself of ever. taking. one. solitary. sip. of rye whiskey again.