"Now tell me Patrick are you not a good catholic man like meself?"
"Sure I am Michael, and that's the truth"
"So you would'nt consider using a condom?"
"I would not Michael! That would be a mortal sin."
" So tell me how it is Patrick that I have 17 children while you have none?"
"Sure I use the safe method Michael"
"So how does that work then?"
"Well you see, I pop round to your house while you're on nights."
Lots of love Ann and Dave