I mentioned this song in another thread, and someone asked for the complete lyrics. This is by the Austin Lounge Lizards. The verses are pretty much just spoken, and the choruses are sung - if anyone has the chords for the chorus or the music for the underlying melody of the spoken parts, I'd appreciate that being posted.
(spoken:)I know you smoke, I know you drink that brew
I just can't abide a sinner like you
You know, God can't either, that's why I know it to be true
That Jesus loves me, but he can't stand you
I'm goin' straight to heaven, boys, when I die
'Cause I've crossed every T and I've dotted every I
Why, my preacher tells me that I'm God's kind of guy
That's why Jesus loves me.....but you're gonna fry
(cho) - God loves all His children, by gum
That don't mean He won't incinerate some
Can't you feel those hot flames lickin' you?
(spoken) - I'm raisin' my kids in a righteous way
So don't you be bringin' your kids over to my house to play
Why, yours will grow up stoned, left-leaning, and gay
I know - Jesus told me on the phone today
(cho) - Jesus loves me, this I know
And he told me where you're gonna go
There's lots of room for your kind - down below
(spoken, with "Jesus loves me but he can't stand you" by chorus under) -
Jesus loves me, he loves me real good
I know he does because he called me up on the phone today and told me how much he loves me
He said, "Son, I loooooove you"
He speaks English pretty well, considering it's a second language for him
You can talk to him too, you know, I've got a 900-number in Tulsa that you can call him at - I do it all the time
He'll be glad to hear from you, I talk to him every day
(together, lead & chorus, half-spoken, half-sung) - Jesus loves me, but he can't stand you!