Sometime ago when I reached home at night,
The wife greeted me, her face full of delight.
To the drawing roomm led me, sat me on a chair,
Picked up a paper and murmured, "Read there".
I then understood why her smile was so bland,
For an advert referred to the sale of some land.
On this very subject we'd chatted of late,
And had ideas of buying a little estate.
I, the advert then read, and in bold type it said,

"Winkle-on-sea, Winkle-on-sea,
The great sale takes place there next Thursday at three.
The air it is grand and the prospect gigantic,
It's faced on three sides by the rolling Atlantic.
Winkle-on-sea, Winkle-on-sea,
The tickets for railway and luncheon are free.
Don't hestitate, or 'twill then be too late.
The chance of a lifetime is Winkle-on-sea."

Thursday soon came, and I went to that sale,
The train put us down at a place known as Kale.
Then a drive of some miles through the country so free,
In a couple of hours we had reached the marquee.
We sat down to luncheon, 'twas very well served,
A man sitting next to me quietly observed,
"The place is a goldmine, it's certain to go,
Buy as much as you can, old man, I'm in the know."
Advice such as this, I thought too good to miss.

Winkle-on-sea, Winkle-on-sea,
That auctioneer he kept looking at me.
I thought that he knew me, and kept nodding back,
Then down went the hammer each time with a whack.
Winkle-on-sea, Winkle-on-sea,
Everyone crowded round to congratulate me
That auctioneer dude had my nods miscontrued.
I had bought the whole bally lot - Winkle-on-sea.

This is followed by about forty lines of patter (which I can't get my OCR app to 'read' and I can't be bothered to type it all out), after which the song continues:

Winkle-on-sea, Winkle-on-sea,
The sales may take place every Thursday at three.
The air may be grand and the prospect gigantic,
Faced on fours sides by the rolling Atlantic.
Winkle-on-sea, Winkle-on-sea,
The next sale they hold they must do without me,
Beneath the star's twinkle, 'midst home of the winkle,
Ah! I learnt a wrinkle at Winkle-on-sea.