BANG! BANG! BANG!
(Carter & Van Thal)

At five o' clock this morning the dawn was breaking red
When I put on my shooting boots and shot right out of bed
With pockets full of cartridges I strolled across the lea
While I was after partridges the Squire was after me
And heavings how I shot. What do you think I got?

CHORUS:
Sixteen beaters, a peacock and a cow
The postman, the dustman
The barmaid at the Plough
What shots - pot shots - how the Welkin rang
Oh what a wonderful day we had,
Bang! Bang! Bang!

At nine o'clock this morning I was in the butts
I don't know who suggested it. I fancy he was nuts
I didn't care how damp I got or mind my aching feet
The trouble was the cramp I got between my shooting stick
But I revived a bit on hearing what I'd hit.

CHORUS:
Sixteen beaters, a peacock and a cow
The postman, the dustman
The barmaid at the Plough
What shots - pot shots - how the Welkin rang
Oh what a wonderful day we had,
Bang! Bang! Bang!

At twelve o'clock this morning we all sat down to lunch
The Squire gave me a gin and it, and I gave him a punch
I told him he was not the man to meet upon a moor
And thereupon I shot him and gave him to the poor
The picnic wasn't bad, I'll tell you what we had.

CHORUS:
Sixteen vicars, a kipper and a port
Fruit tarts, jam tarts, drinks of every sort
Champagne, real pain, onions and a chop
Oh, what a wonderful day we had,
Pop! Pop! Pop!



Written and composed by Carter & Van Thal
Performed by Nellie Wallace (1870-1948)

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The above is from

http://monologues.co.uk/musichall/Songs-B/Bang-Bang-Bang.htm