When you're in a railway train
Never look out of the window pane
I was in a carriage one day
It happened to my regret

This is the way it was, you see
One of the passengers said to me
"Just lean out the window and see if the train has started yet"
I leaned out the window and my hat blew away
I leaned out the catch it like an eediot at play
Oh me pants were tight and they busted
The passengers behind
Said "What a wonderful view, old cock, you'd better pull down the blind!"

This is how I remember my grandma singing it to us as kids