I agree with you, McGrath of Harlow. I've never heard the term 'passive-assertive' before, but I kind of like it. I've always liked the idea, with any emotion, of recognizing the choice that of regulating the intensity of the emotion by acting 'opposite' to what it urges us to do. And it's still authentic....because I'm not 'pretending' I don't feel that way. I think it's great, when we're angry at somebody, to decide to do something particularly kind to the person we're anger at.   I find it really 'evens' the anger and puts it into perspective.   

But if the person I was angry at asked me if I were angry about what he/she did.....or if there seemed to be a sensitive time to express it.......I'd certainly acknowledge it.

So..........I'm wondering if there are any good 'passive-assertive' songs out there!