@ Jim C
Ah, Jim :(
I know a great many gay folk that could tell similar stories. They made great parents and, most of them, their children have done well and still accept them. Lavender marriages are certainly no stranger to these shores, as it offered protection to both partners in 'seeming normal' to those ho would frown about them or worse. I know some great gay parents and it is extremely common these days for women to eventually come out late in life as gay and live with a woman once the children have flown the nest. I also know some remarkably unselfish partners who have know 'the secret' and made no demands. A gay man and a gay woman who love each other emotionally but not physically is not unusual these days.
So many trans folk are forced to comply and lead an exaggerated life in order to try and fit in but, eventually, the genie cannot be kept in the bottle any longer or suicide ensues. Even being trans can lead to a very early violent death (as being gay can too). All because people cannot live and let live.
I hate hate :(
But I also know the greatness of those beautiful folk who support and accept, love and care. It's not all bad news thanfully.