pfr sez - I must join a church or a border morris side to learn how to be offended.
Oh no - don't become one of those decent people, I wouldn't recommend it at all, really. What I would recommend would be to come to the United States. You'd love it. I understand your family obligation wouldn't permit it tho, (I cared for my mom & dad for 20 years, the last 12 were 24/7 365).
Take care & and thanks for the huge laff, (i loved being called sanctimonious, had tears rolling down my cheeks, literally).
P.S. this is not a wind-up