The Poop-Flingers Ball Two baboons from old Senegal, A gorilla, a chimp, and an orangutan all Met up together at the old town hall For the forty-fifth annual Poop-Flingers Ball. Now, the reason they met at the Poop-Flingers Ball Was to fling their poop against the wall, To see whose poop would stick the best And whose just wouldn't pass the test. Well, the first to fling was the two baboons. They'd trained by eating lots of prunes, But it made their poop so thin and runny It would not stick for love nor money. The next one up was that old gorilla. He'd eaten bananas, his poop was yellow. He flung a turd at the shit-house door, But it fell right down upon the floor. And then came the orangutan. He flung his poop at the ceiling fan, Which slung it out to all four walls, But it ran right off and didn't stick at all. The last to fling was the chimpanzee And his poop stuck! It would not come free! And the reason why, I'll tell you true, Is he'd mixed his poop with super glue! When the other apes learned the chimp had cheated, They grew irate, their tempers heated, And they began to scream and bellow And fling their poop at that cheating fellow. They were so angry and so sore They chased him out the kitchen door Hollering, "Go away and don't come back! You are no longer welcome, Jack!" So, the moral of this painful story, This shameful, sordid allegory, Is "Do not cheat, always be true, And don't mix your poop with super glue."
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