This is done in the style of talking blues.


A POLITICIAN'S DOG
Written by Billy Ed Wheeler
As recorded by Layne Brooks on the various-artists collection "Doggone Country: Favorite Songs about Dogs" (2008)

Well, now, I was born on a Texas ranch,
But it seems like I never did get the chance
To cut the mustard like my daddy Rover,
Roll in the grass and get dirty all over.
I'm a dog. Registered beagle. The name of our little ol' ranch was the LBJ.

When I's just a long-eared, wet-nosed pup,
Big daddy Lyndon came an' picked me up,
Held me seven feet in the Texas sky
And he said to a bunch o' news men standin' by:
"His name's Him. Him's a he-dog." Some o' them fellows didn't believe him, had to look for themselves.

Well, I picked up all the hound-dog habits,
Coolin' fire-plugs an' chasin' rabbits,
Even had one or two lady friends,
But that's where the end o' my fun begins,
Because one day the president pulled my ear
And he said: "Sorry, Him; it's an election year."
Flash bulbs popped like a machine gun,
An' I knew right then I'd have to help him run.
Me in luck, wantin' some night life. Just a big ol' frustrated beagle in a jet airplane.

Well me an' my sister Her set sail
With LBJ on the campaign trail,
Tryin' to keep the Republicans fumin',
Flyin' around till I's sick as a human,
Workin' all day and stayin' up late,
Lickin' tourists through the White-House gate,
Nibblin' congressmen, keepin' them nervous,
Playin' hide-an'-seek with the Secret Service,
Trackin' down Russians. Bitin' ambassadors. Tryin' to learn how to bark in a foreign language.

I tell you right now it's gettin' me down.
Ever' time a king or a queen hits town,
The vet hurries over an' combs my hair,
Clips my nails and sprays me ev'rywhere
Till I smell like a hundred magnolia trees,
And the powder flies ever' time I sneeze.
I could leave all this stuff alone
For a good case o' fleas an' one ol' bone,
But that's politics. Had to get out the vote. Sleep with a stopped-up nose in an air-conditioned dog-house.


[This was originally recorded by Uncle Jud Crowfield and the New Kentucky Travelers in 1965, and was soon covered by Billy Ed Wheeler and Ferlin Husky.] [Is a recording properly called a "cover" if it's sung by the guy who wrote it, but he wasn't the first to record it? In other words, can a singer "cover" his own song?]