I've never had any problem just turning up. People are generally very welcoming.
The Grey Cock in Brum refused to let me sing because they were strictly traddy, and I told them my influences were Ralph McTell - and they said, we have to draw the line somewhere - but that was about forty years ago. I don't think anyone has turned me down since.
I can only think you've been very unlucky in the places you have gone to.
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sj