Sang it my Jr Year as a solo in 1983. I am now 54.

Just hear the clock it's striking one
The afternoon has just begun
The sky's a glow with a gleaming Sun
But oh what a dismal day everything's turning gray for...

The table's set the candle's lit and everyone's about to sit
But Ma is in an awful snit
Cuz no one can kill the turkey

The candied yams are on the plate
The relatives are at the gate
But everyone will have to wait
Cuz no one can kill the turkey

The cranberry sauce has melted
And so has the Camembert
Now everyone has felt it here this tension in the air for...

The chestnuts roasting on the stove
The eggnog with a touch of clove
But Pa's a lovely shade of mauve
Cuz though it may sound absurd
No one can kill the bird

La, La, La, La, La, La, La...

Just hear the clock it's striking 3
And we're depressed as we can be
Including all of our company
Cuz everyone here is starved
For something that can be carved and...

The carving knife is sharp and keen
We're washed and dressed our hands are clean
But Ma is making quite a scene
Cuz no one can kill the turkey

The goose is cooked the soup is hot
The pudding's cooking in the pot
It's made with Plum and apricot
But no one can kill the turkey

We all have grown attached to him So on this holiday
I left the door unlatched for him
So he could get away

And the house is in an awful mess
And so is dinner, more or less
But all in all I must confess
That both the turkey and I
Are so thankful we could cry