LOVE’S LABOURS LOST (aka Back Seat of the Holden)

Paul Lawler

Well I went to the dance on the Friday night
Met a little girl, such a pretty, pretty sight
She said that she wouldn’t, but I thought that she might
Lie with me, in the back seat of the Holden.

Well her eyes were blue and her hair was gold
She said my advances were very, very bold
Although she said no, I thought she’d get rolled
With me in the back seat of the Holden.

Well in comes Don Juan and he asks her for a dance
There was a wilt in me trousers; something happened to me lance
And I knew that this bloke, would take away me chance
For to lie in the back seat of the Holden.

Well I watched him drink his Martini dry
And knew that a visit to the lavatory was nigh
The door hit him faster than he undid his fly
I was off to the back seat of the Holden.

With Don Juan’s nose flat, I carried on the quest
To try and get this little lady safely on the nest
I said, you look tired, why don’t you have a rest
Lie with me in the back seat of the Holden.

Well we walked to the car, I was full of hope
- I was also full of beer - but still I thought I’d cope
But after the kissing - and just before the grope -
I fell asleep … in the back seat of the Holden.


(the late) Paul Lawler, Darwin 1984 ©


In these current climes, possibly a rather non-PC song!! But this self-deprecating little ditty (which, however, Paul swore was not autobiographical!!), was very popular in its time in Darwin’s folk scene.
He wrote it to be accompanied by his appalachian dulcimer, as in this Top End Folk Club recording from the song’s early days : go to 30:34   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W7PsCsWL6Pk&t=15s


R-J