Thompson, I think that ship has sailed for me. The problem is that my lower gut is already significantly compromised by diverticulosis, so high-fibre foods are too challenging. If the problem was farts alone I would go out and buy dulse tomorrow, but a severe belly-ache that isn’t over three days later is a whole different matter.

The first such flare-up hit me about 20 years ago, and I’ve had them two to three times a year ever since. (There were plenty of doctor visits and fancy imaging adventures — X-rays, CAT scans, gastroscopies — along the way.) Until Sunday, I hadn’t had one since just before Easter, coincidentally about 10 days before I started down the keto trail.

As soon as I stopped eating high-fibre foods, most of which are high in carbohydrates — the less-threatening symptoms of diverticulosis (notably the constant flatulence) just up and vanished, and until Sunday I didn’t have so much as a twinge of discomfort, let alone a full-blown diverticulitis flare complete with sleepless nights and low-grade fever. But within a few hours of eating a single flipping serving of beans I was squirming in pain.

I’m bright enough to take the hint without letters of fire on the wall.

Meanwhile, normal life goes on. Today was spent taking a fellow chorister up the road to Clinton for cataract surgery, waiting (and waiting, and waiting) for her to emerge from recovery, driving her home, and then hanging around for a couple of hours to ensure that she continues to recover properly from the anaesthetic. We aging ladies have to hang together!