Cool Beans, love your parody!

This one is past its prime already, and probably not suitable for marches, but I'll share it here anyway...

MAPMAKER
To the Tune of "Matchmaker"
by Sheldon Harnick & Jerry Bock
new words by Vikki Appleton
© 10 Feb 2025

Mapmaker, Mapmaker,
make me a map
Do as I say, fill it with crap
Mapmaker, Mapmaker,
be a good schnook
And make me a rubbish map

Mapmaker, Mapmaker,
I’ll bring the lies
You bring the map
for us to revise
Fill it with swill
for I’m longing to be
The Caesar of all I see

For Bannon, make it outrageous
For Elon, add a swastika too
Don’t think of being courageous
Just follow the orders I give to you

Mapmaker, Mapmaker, make me a map
Do as I say, fill it with crap
Day after day in DC I’m a drone
So make me a map all my own...

Donald, oh Donald, have I got a map for you
The countries and towns
Are all named after you
So it’s a nice plan, a good map, true?
True
It ought to make you happy
Your ego satisfy
Although it prob’ly won’t
Don’t ask me why

Did you think we’d make some prints?
Well, I do the best I can
With no wisdom, no morals,
       no sense of discretion
It’s mad you’ve got a plan!

Mapmaker, Mapmaker make it so good
I’ll tell you how, I know we could
I am a genius but misunderstood
So… crown me a king
Groom me for doom
Find me a mind
Map me some crap
And make me a hapless map!

(Many thanks to Joe Offer for the idea for this parody.)