I was attacked by a bear in "Niendorf Gehege" zoo, near germany. And what a fiendish attack it was...

I do not know the english word for this race. In German they are named "Kragenbär" which describes their white "necklace". From somewhere in Asia I believe. They are not too big, smaller than the european brown bear. But it doesn´t matter anyway... this one is sitting in his corral, nearly lying on his back, all paws up, and grabs his legs with his forebaws. A very obscene sight, for you can study his rectum "en detail"... and then... you see it open... hear a little noise like "Puff"... and this shameless creature lets loose the most teriffic fart I ever smelled... Phee!