Thank you, Sourdough, for sharing this with us! My tears have been streaming as I read it…

I haven't said anything in this thread before but I've read everything with great interest. I guess I can't find the right words but your story is very, very fine and important. As for me I've recently lost a sister and I hope and think I managed to have the same attitude. She was anesthetized (?) as it would have been too painful to be awake with all instruments and so and we never got the chance to talk to her after she arrived to the intensive care unit. But we were with her a lot of the time (for about a week) and talked to her and I gave her healing (Reiki) but prayed that God should do what was best for her. If she had survived she might have had too many problems to get a good life and I guess that's why God made the decision that it was better for her to die.

Her heart gave up for a couple of times but they made it start again. Then the doctor talked to us and told us there was no chance so we decided that we should let her go the nest time it happened. It was... I don't know how to explain this in English... it felt strange but both good and bad. Many of us were sitting at her bed and we knew that the end would come very soon.

We didn't meet so often but most often talked on the phone. When we met it was most often at her place. But the weekend before she came to the hospital I had invited her for dinner and we talked for hours... There was nothing then that showed that she was ill. That makes me very happy to think of and I think God had a finger in the pie there too!

And I'm absolutely sure that they can "hear" what we say even if they are in coma or anesthetized. There are people who have survived and told that they've heard everything! Doc's and nurses also have a big responsibility here - never say negative things near a person who doesn't seem to be able to hear things!!!

Somebody mentioned Elisabeth Kubler-Ross and her books are really wonderful! Aha, that was you too!

Berit