Don't know why my reset cookie still shows me as guest, and damn, this is a hell of a way to find out me own dear brother is sick. Anyway, here's a little offering from the lower ranks of the clan:

Chippy Zippy -- to the tune of "Short People" by Randy Newman, the Great (Note: by poetic licence, the name Jose here kinda rhymes with Josie. ;o/)

Chippy Zippy got no reason
Chippy Zippy got no reason
Chippy Zippy got no reason to run

He got Spindley legs, he got ugly hooves
All he ever does is lose, lose, lose
Gonna take him out to old Islama -
Bad and hand him off to mean Osama
Chippy Zippy got no reason to run

Chippy Zippy is just as good as you or me
And fools such as we
Maybe he just got lost or he had to pee
He's a beautiful soul

Chippy Zippy got no reason
Chippy Zippy got no reason
Chippy Zippy got no reason to run

He doesn't gallop, he can barely mosey
He lost a footrace to a guy named Jose
Slow as turtles watching wall paint dry
He finally won one on his 90th try

Don't let no Chip-Zippy

Can't have no Chip-Zippy

Won't let no Chip-Zippy run here