Jim Dixon... Oh why did you ask about the British "Beside the Seaside"? Oh how that takes me back to those happy days gathered round the old steam wireless while Billy Cotton and Co and every other music-hall oriented crooner and all their friends, enemies and associated hangers-on would sing...

Oh, I do like to be beside the seaside
I do like to beside the sea.
I do like to stroll upon the prom, prom, prom,
Where the brass band plays,
Tiddley-om-pom-pom.
Oh, I do like to be beside the seaside,
I like to be beside the sea,
And there's lots of girls beside,
That I'd like to be beside,
Beside the seaside, beside the sea.

There may have been other words, but I usually managed to get out of the room in time. Not only that but some clown "..at the keyboard of the mighty Wurlitzer..." would also try hammering it out time after time while massed battalions of British holidaymakers with handkerchiefs on their heads and their trousers rolled up joined in for umpteen repetitions.

I'll probably never forgive you......