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User Name Thread Name Subject Posted
GUEST,macca Lyr Req: Parody on Green Fields of France (26) Lyr Add: THE BAND PLAYED WALTZING MATILDA (parody) 10 May 02


Hey MartinRyan - Thank you very kindly - that's the one all right and it'll go down a treat.. The following is the parody on THE BAND PLAYED WALTZING MATILDA….. God help you all...

When I was a young man I slicked back my hair,
And I lived the wild life of a rocker.
From six o'clock rock to the Stadium aisles,
I raged like a regular ocker.
Then the Beatles took over, rock and roll disappeared.
No time for bodgies, our duck-tails looked weird.
So I sold my old hot-rod, and I grew my first beard.
And I bought an electric guitar.

And the band played "Stairway to Heaven",
And it played it again and again.
So I practiced that tune,
Till it made me a loon.
There's still something wrong with my brain.

Oh, how well I remember that terrible sound,
We made when we first started grooving.
And how in my garage we practised all night,
And the neighbours, they all started moving.
And the bass was so heavy that it shook the night air,
The beat was so solid, but we didn't care.
The rhythm and lead were lost in there - somewhere,
And the drummer wore holes in his cymbals.

And the band played "Stairway to Heaven",
And as we stopped to massage our ears.
As our senses returned,
We could smell something burn,
We had blown every fuse in the street.

Well those who stayed with us, we tried to survive
The splits to the line-up, the changing.
And for what seemed like years, my mate and myself,
Were the band, while the others kept moving.
Then a big Decca scout knocked me arse over head.
And when he came at me, I though I was dead.
But he grabbed my guitar, and he smashed it, and said,
He was doing us all a big favour.

And I'll go no more A-G-C-D – C
For the techno, heavy metal and swing.
For to strum out those things,
A bloke needs some strings.
No more paying instalments for me.

So we gathered together, my mates and myself,
And decided we'd just better chuck it.
The hopelessly tone deaf, the ones with no voice,
Who couldn't carry a tune in a bucket.
And we'd made that decision, the best of our life,
And we packed it all in, I went home to my wife,
And I found she'd run off, with some ratbag from Fife.
Who sang bleedin' Country and Western.

And the band played Stairway to Heaven,
And I just couldn't take any more,
So I laid on the floor,
Stuck my head in the stove door,
But forgot we were bloody electric.

So now every Friday, I sit in the club,
And I watch the band carry their gear in.
And I see the head-bangers slumped over their beers,
Burnt-out, tattooed, hard of hearing.
And the band plays Deep Purple, it plays all the Doors.
Boring old tunes for these tiring old bores.
And the young rebels ask, "Have they been through the wars?"
And I……'ve just forgotten the question.

And the band plays Stairway to Heaven,
And the write-offs remember their teens.
It's the same boring song,
We heard bong after bong.
But nobody knows what it means.


Line breaks added. Also changed message title so it might be found easier with a search. --JoeClone


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