The thread title is very evocative, Nicole - like part of an unfinished Haiku.
We learn from the lives and deaths of others, (we must; else what are we here for?) and you made that clear in your post. Sometimes the lessons are a long time coming, other times they are more immediate. The important thing is that you were there, you opened up your home, bathroom and all, and you were competent and capable when it was needed. The girlfriend is fortunate that it is you next door. It's poignant that in the midst of her shock, she could let you know that you impacted his life with your music. You never know, you never know...