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User Name Thread Name Subject Posted
GUEST,Lyle BS: Mutual Support - through the rough patches (38) RE: BS: Mutual Support - through the rough patchs 10 Apr 03

I know this is a whole lot easier to say than to do, and I also recognize that I am offering a somewhat specific approach to a problem that I know nothing about. With those limitations, one thing that has helped some folks is to try to separate the cause(s) from the symptoms, and learn to deal with the causes.

Oversimplifying to make a point, suppose I am unhappy at work, with my symptoms being withdrawn, overeating, drinking, whatever. Don't spend time finding ways to treat those symptoms. Try an in depth look at EXACTLY what it is that causes the unhappyness, and find ways to eleminate or at least tolerate that. In many cases, the symptoms then disappear.

That is not always a solution, though. I have a friend who refuses to do that, even though she knows what the causes are, but is afraid to address her cause (him, really). But causes are not always other people.

Hope this makes some sense. At least I hope it lets you realize that other people care.


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