A ballad of unending domestic upheaval by Michael Flanders and Donald Swann ©1959. Performed in the musical revue At the Drop of a Hat

The Gas Man Cometh


'Twas on a Monday morning the Gas man came to call
The gas tap wouldn't turn, I wasn't getting gas at all
He tore out all the skirting board to try to find the main
And I had to call a carpenter to put it back again
Oh, it all makes work for the working man to do

'Twas on a Tuesday morning the carpenter came round
He hammered and he chiseled and he said: 'Look what I've found
Your joists are full of dry rot but I'll put it all to rights'
Then nailed right through a cable and out want all the lights
Oh, it all makes work for the working man to do

'Twas on a Wednesday morning the electrician came
He called me 'Mr. Sanderson', which isn't quite my name
He couldn't reach the fuse box without standing on the bin
And his foot went through a window so I called a glazier in
Oh, it all makes work for the working man to do

'Twas on a Thursday morning the glazier came along
With his blow-torch and his putty and his merry Glazier's song
He put another pane in, it took no time at all
But I had to get a painter in to come and paint the wall
Oh, it all makes work for the working man to do

'Twas on a Friday morning the painter made a start
With undercoats and overcoats he painted every part
Every nook and every cranny but I found when he was gone
He'd painted over the gas tap and I couldn't turn it on
Oh, it all makes work for the working man to do

On Saturday and Sunday they do no work at all,
So 'Twas on a Monday morning the Gas man came to call!

Cheerily,
Charley Noble