We have decided to toss that so-called "translator" we bought at Ralphs in the trash and use our own. And, save for those times when we wish to make a point, we'll just use your typeface, fonts, and so forth.

Perhaps you are wondering how we, as freds, obtain access to your "Mudcat." The answer, of course, is quite simple.

As for Bubba Bubba (we might as well call ither by the name you know), sheit is in perfect health. Moreover, in the fungoid state is it not possible to tell an untruth: if "Khandu" and "bee-dubya-ell" are named as genetic donors for the hatchlings, such must be the case. "bee-dubya-ell" might still exist as viable protein, but Bubba Bubba obviously obtained his (is "bee-dubya-ell" male?) chromosonal pattern somewhere, and as such he is both legally and morally responsible for the hatchlings' maintenance until they are of age to feist for themselves.

Now we must reveal a Great Secret to you. You are members of an elect group, and are bound to take whatever action about this you feel appropriate and necessary. If you are squeamish about taking such action, read no further.

The Great Secret is this:

William Shatner, who passes as an actor, singer, and other things on this your world, is in actually a member of the same race as Ralphs, those who run that goddamn cheapo gyp joint out Cygnus way.