I seem to be having my yearly PTSD freakout right now. I seem to have those every year in the late summer or fall. And this year, with the Patriot Act stuff that's going on, there's a lot of material for my fertile imagination to work with.

This past weekend we went to Ontario to visit with some of JtS' family. A strange thing happened when we crossed the border coming back into the US. We had picked up some groceries while in Ontario. I'm allergic to corn, and it's difficult if not impossible to find ketchup, spaghetti sauce, and especially cola beverages in the US that don't contain corn syrup, but in Canada, it is possible to find these products without any corn syrup in them. So we picked up a supply of some of those things, including two twelve-packs of Coca-Cola, and then we went to the duty free store and picked up some beer and wine.

The day before, I had used the computer at JtS' father's office in Ontario to send a couple of e-mails. One of them was to Howard Dean. I told him, in response to his comparison between his philosophy toward the Middle East, and that of President Clinton, that I didn't consider President Clinton to have been an honest broker in the Middle East, and I explained why (with the obligatory links to newspaper articles to support what I was saying).

When we got to the border, the guard was very suspicious of us. When JtS handed him the INS documentation that allows him to return to the US after being in Canada, the guard acted like he'd never seen anything like it before. We showed him JtS' work permit and he acted like he'd never seen one of those either. He asked us a bunch of questions about what we had in the car and what we'd purchased in Canada. We answered all of his questions. He asked us if we had anything else to tell him and we said "no".   Then he slapped a card onto the windshield, tucked JtS' documentation under the windshield-wiper, and told us where to pull the car over for the INS guys to tend to us.

After we pulled over, we handed our papers to the men who approached us. One of them looked puzzled when he saw it and said to one of the other men in a puzzled tone of voice, "She's a US citizen. Maybe he's never seen one of these (waving the INS papers) before." He said that two or three times.

They told us to go into the building and wait. Then they searched the car. After maybe fifteen or twenty minutes, a man came to the desk of the building we were in, handed us our papers, and told us we could leave.

When we got home, I couldn't find the two twelve-packs of Coca-Cola anywhere, and a CD that I had brought with me that had some files from one of my old computers was missing from its case.

Now, maybe I'm crazy for being so paranoid. Maybe we forgot to put the Coca-Cola into the car, although I'm pretty sure I remember putting it in there. And maybe the CD was missing from its case before we got to the border. On the other hand, maybe they were both in the car when we got to the border. If so, why take two twelve-packs of Coca-Cola? The CD I guess I can understand.

Could they have put a listening device somewhere in our stuff and they're making recordings of us saying "They took our coke"? Could they have planted some drugs in our car so they can "find" them next time we try to cross the border? Is the patriot act destroying our democracy? Have I gone completely 'round the bend?

Now I'm afraid to go back into Canada (or rather to go there and then attempt to return to the US).