I was holed up in a hotel
And I couldn't see my friends
And my plans for Portsmouth partying
All met sorry ends
I couldn't leave or even phone
Oh lord, there were no joys
But I could play my bagpipes
Well, I could at least make noise
I went many a mile for this trial
A side trip was my plan, but I
Was sequestered then went westward
Back to Mich-i-gan.

CHORUS:
My butt was bored in Boston
Then I had to head back home
Mutter, sputter, grumble, piss and moan

Nice to see you're still breathing, Mick!

Mike & Tony, come back here right now! Seriously, I hope to hear when your CD comes out.