John Green the grocer lived a peaceful life
He kept his mother to feed and protect him
And he never ever dared go look for a wife
Fearing that women would all reject him
One spring when football was changing to cricket
And the roar of the traffic was drowned by birds
When he went to buy his Springtime season ticket
At the booking office window he read these words

Chorus
Dont try to peer through the hole in the glass
Speak at the opaque space provided

He boarded his diesel with a thoughtful air
And saw the little schoolgirls dressed in black
Sat up at the front seats combing their hair
In the massive shadow of the drivers back
And he thought if those girls saw my face
They would giggle with a tinkling feminine sound
So I'll buy a sheet of glass with an opaque space
And serve in my shop with my back turned round
saying:-

So the very next day his customers saw
The space above the counter taken
By a sheet of glass not there before
There was no reply when they asked for bacon
One of the customers peered wide eyed
But all she could see was the back of a head
Then a hand edged out with their bacon tied
And a neatly printed card which read

Now the customers talked and the press came to
They pried and they peered but they couldnt closer
And soon the whole wondering nation knew
Its invisible backward facing grocer
His gentlemanly ability to hide all feeling
Made the breasts of the League of Political Women stir
And John Green rose via M.P. for Ealing
To Invisible backward Facing Prime minister
Saying in Parliament And in the Cabinet And sometimes quietly to himself in the bath :-

Inspired by British Rail doing away with the old grills at booking offices and replacing them with Shatterproof Plastiglass with a circular space that was audio clear. AND there was a sign that said
Dont try to peer through the hole in the glass,Speak at the opaque space provided.

Not a bad effort cosidering I havent sung this for about ten years.If
any one wants the chords I will have to look up the book when I get home.Or PM me and I might be able to e-mail the dots.