All of this is so helpful. Yes, I know I need to face my feelings and talk about them (no one's ever been able to shut me up before, so why start now?). And I'm aware that this is going to take time, and it's so new and raw I can't imagine getting through day after day.

I used to weep in Byron's arms about my difficult, draining work. I would wail, "how can I get through the next 13 years (till retirement)???. He would hold me, and let me cry, then he would say, "You don't have to get through the next 13 years. You only have to get through this moment now."