I think this is a very valuable thread for many of us.

This song by Tim O'Brien and P. Alger packs such an intense grief-releasing wallop, for me, that it had me in tears the first time I heard it, which was surely at least 8 years after my mother's death. At first I studiously avoided listening to it, feeling too vulnerable, and then I would turn it up when it came on the radio, and finally I went out and bought the CD (Tim O'Brien and the O'Boys, "Oh Boy!", on Sugar Hill Records). (Info here.)


Time to Learn

The hand is cold
That once held mine
I can't believe
You've really left this world behind
I can't wait
And I can't hope
I'll get over this in time.

It takes time to learn
When someone's gone for good
That you're not coming back
Like you wish they would
In the empty hours
When you miss them so
Then it's time to learn
To let them go

Your last hours
We never knew
We never had a chance
To say goodbye to you
Words unsaid and things undone
We'd just begun and now
We'll never see them through

It takes time to learn
When someone's gone for good
They're not coming back
Like you wish they would
In the empty hours
When you miss them so
It takes time to learn
To let them go

It takes time to learn
That you're gone for good
You're not coming back
Like I wish you would
In the empty hours
When I miss you so
Then it's time to learn
To let you go

The hand is cold
That once held mine.