9.    The Georgians will sneak into the other half of the pitch, mow it
and then claim that it was all in line with European "grass quotas". They
will then curl up under the posts and have a kip until half time, when their
appeal for compensation against the UK government will be heard.

10. The Japanese will attempt to strengthen their team by offering good
salaries to the key opposition players and then run around the pitch at high
speed in a highly efficient manner before buying the ground (with a subsidy
from the UK Government).

11. The French will declare they have new scientific evidence that the
opposition are in fact all mad. They will then park lorries across the
halfway line, let sheep loose in the opposition half and burn the officials.

12. The Australians will have a barbie before negotiating lucrative singing
and TV contracts in the UK. They will then invite all their mates to come
and live with them in Shepherds Bush, London.

13. Unfortunately the Committee were unable to accept the Welsh suggestion,
following complaints from the RSPCA.