There is only one thing to do, go private!!! Buy a shooting stick then you can look sporty, be a little "dangerous" cos some of them have spikes on the end, and you can sit on it in crowded pubs and on the tube etc. Then you dont have to give it back and can decorate it how you like.

By the way, the NHS expects to loose a HUGE proportion of those Aluminium stiks it issues, just look in any lost property office and they are over run with the things!! (Not that I would be recomending that you "lost" it when you paint it black and attach the skull handle to it etc etc etc) :-)