I have just done a search and it aint there but I DID post this back then. The Footprints on the Dashboard is from Oscar Brand's Letters to and from a Young Man on the Album Bawdy Songs Goes to College.

M is for the many times You made me
O is for the other times You tried
T is for those Tawdry Frat House weekends
H is for my hope I'd be a bride
E is for your everlasting Passin
R is for the ruin you made of me
Put them all together they spell Mother
And thats just It seems I'm going to be.

F is for your funny little letter
A is for the Answer to your note
T is for the tearful sad occasion
H is for your hope I'll be the goat
E is for the ease with which I made you
R is for the Rube you think I'll be
Put them all together they spell Father
But you'll never pin that label ,dear on me


Was it you who did the pushing, Put the stain upon the cushion
Footprints on the dashboard upside down
Was it you you sly woodpecker,Got into my girl Rebecca
If it was you'd better leave this town

Yes twas I who did the pushing,Put the stain upomn the cushion
Footprints on the dashboard upside down
But since i got into your daughter,I've had trouble passing water
So I think that makes us even all around.