A broken down harlot named Tupps
Was heard to exclaim in her cups
The height of my folly
Was screwing a Collie
But, I got a good price for the pups.

a clean one?

There once was a girl named Ann Farrell
Who loved to play "Stud" for apparel
Her oponent's straight flush
Brought a maidenly blush
And a hasty trip home in a barrel.

There was a woman named Anna,
Who thought she could play the pianna
But, what do you know? on her very first show
She got hit with a rotten bananna.

There was a fella named Carter
A world class prodigious farter
He could fart anything from God Save the King
To Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata.