The DC-3 bearing Fat Freddie banked out over Lake Michigan and glided onto the tarmac of Chicago's Meigs Field. As it taxied to the terminal, Fat Freddie considered his plan of action. Frizell, Frizell's bimbo wife, that chump Chimp dick Chongo... Who to visit first? Nah! The answer was obvious. Start with the ones that created the problem. Start with the Baboons. Anyway, Freddie had a genuine aversion to doin' humans and didn't really like puttin' the squeeze on other Chimps, but Baboons were another story. Truth be told, Fat Freddie didn't like baboons at all...

The springs of the taxicab that transported Fat Freddie from Meigs to the Southside block where the Baboons held court sighed in relief as they were relieved of the load imposed by the Chimp's substantial girth. As he waddled toward what he knew to be the main entranceway into the Baboons' makeshift compound he felt the eyes of dozens of Drills and Mandrills peering at him. It made no difference. They could look all they wanted. They could even spit, scream or moon him with their bright red asses, but they didn't dare really harm him. Though currently out of favor with Stretch and The Boss his position in the hierarchy of the Simian Crime Syndicate was still high enough to afford him immunity from harm by such low-lifes. To hurt him, The Boss's envoy, would be to bring down the wrath of the entire Syndicate. Even Baboons weren't that dumb.

Freddie's knock on the compound door was greeted with a surly "Whattaya want?" from the Baboon lieutenant who thrust his head through the barely head-sized sliding opening in the door.

With a speed totally unexpected from a chimp so rotund, Freddie's hand shot out and grabbed the unfortunate baboon around the neck, pulling him through the open hatchway until his shoulders banged against the door. "I'm here to see Elmo. And don't give me any 'He's not around' crap. I know he's here and he's got some questions to answer. Now, I'm gonna let go of your scrawny neck and you're gonna open the door nice and polite like. Ya unnerstan'?"

"Yes, Mister Fat Freddie, sir," croaked the now subservient Baboon through his nearly crushed vocal cords, "I'll open the door as soon as you let me down."

Freddie released the insubordinate ape who meekly admitted him into the Baboon lair. "I'll take you right up to see Mister Elmo, sir," he mumbled without having to be asked first.

He led Fat Freddie past piles of refuse typical of the Baboon lifestyle - orange and banana peels, mango seeds, peachpits - and up a flight of stairs to where the door of Elmo's office was already opened.

A tall and well-groomed Mandrill with one gold canine stood from behind the office's large Teak desk. "Fat Freddie," he beamed as he sauntered around the desk with outstretched arms, "So good t' see ya! What brings you t' town?"

Fat Freddie responded by opening his arms to receive the Baboon's embrace, but instead of a friendly hug the huge but agile Chimp put the Baboon in a hammerlock and pushed him face down against the surface of the desk. "You know damned well what I'm here for, Elmo," he snarled in the Baboon Chief's ear, "Just couldn't leave things alone, couldja? The Boss made the plan. The plan was gonna make us all rich. But, no! You idiot Baboons had to go messin' with humans. And what did you get from the humans? Diamonds! What the hell do monkeys need with diamonds? Diamonds are for humans! Monkeys need bananas!!!!"

With that, the Chimp picked up the frightened Elmo (who had not at all been tickled by his meeting with Fat Freddie) and defenestrated him, depositing him, largely unharmed but extremely shaken, onto a pile of mango and avocado pits. It would probably have been more efficient if Fat Freddie had just shot the iridescent-assed creature, but the author's always wanted to use "defenestrate" in a story and never had the chance until now.