The text given above (which seems to be the source of the text in the DT) is missing a few lines, and it has a few words here and there that differ from the sheet music.

Transcribed from the sheet music at The Lester S. Levy Collection of Sheet Music

THE IRISH JUBILEE
Words, J. Thornton. Music, Charles Lawler. 1890.

1. Oh, a short time ago, boys, an Irishman named Doherety
Was elected to the Senate by a very large majority.
He felt so elated that he went to Dennis Cassidy,
Who owned a barroom of a very large capacity.
He said to Cassidy, "Go over to the brewer
For a thousand kegs of lager beer and give it to the poor.
Then go over to the butcher shop and order up a ton of meat.
Be sure and see the boys and girls have all they want to drink and eat.
Send out invitations in twenty different languages,
And don't forget to tell them to bring their own sandwiches.
They've made me their senator, and so to show my gratitude,
They'll have the finest supper ever given in this latitude.
Tell them the music will be furnished by O'Rafferty,
Assisted on the bagpipes by Felix McCafferty.
Whatever the expenses are, remember I'll put up the tin,
And anyone who doesn't come, be sure and do not let them in."

2. Cassidy at once sent out the invitations,
And ev'ryone that came was a credit to their nations.
Some came on bicycles because they had no fare to pay,
And those who didn't come at all, made up their minds to stay away.
Two by three, they marched in the dining hall:
Young men, and old men, and girls that were not men at all,
Blind men, and deaf men, and men who had their teeth in pawn,
Single men, double men, and men who had their glasses on.
Before many minutes nearly ev'ry chair was taken,
Till the front rooms and mushrooms were packed to suffocation.
When everyone was seated, they started to lay out the feast.
Cassidy said, "Rise up and give us each a cake of yeast."
He then said as manager he would try and fill the chair.
We then sat down and we looked at the bill of fare.
There was pig's head, and goldfish, mockingbirds, and ostriches,
Ice cream, and cold cream, Vaseline, and sandwiches.

3. Blue fish, green fish, fishhooks, and partridges,
Fish-balls, snowballs, cannonballs, and cartridges.
Then we ate oatmeal till we could hardly stir about,
Ketchup, and hurry-up, sweet-kraut, and sauerkraut,
Dressed beef, and naked beef, and beef with all its dresses on,
Soda crackers, fire crackers, Limburg cheese with tresses on,
Beefsteaks, and mistakes down on the bill of fare,
Roast ribs, and spare ribs, and ribs that we couldn't spare,
Reindeer, and snow-deer, dear me, and antelope.
The women ate so mush melon, the men said they cantaloupe.
Red herrings, smoked herrings, herrings from old Erin's isle,
Bologna and fruit cake, and sausages a half a mile.
There was hot corn, and cold corn, corn salve, and honey-comb,
Red birds, read books, sea bass, and sea foam,
Fried liver, baked liver, Carter's Little Liver Pills,
And ev'ryone was wondering who was going to pay the bills.

4. For dessert, we had toothpicks, ice picks, and skipping rope,
And washed them all down with a big piece of shaving soap.
We ate ev'rything that was down on the bill of fare,
Then looked on the back of it to see if any more was there.
Then the band played hornpipes, gas-pipes, and Irish reels,
And we danced to the music of "The Wind That Shakes the Barley Fields."
Then the piper played old tunes and spittoons so very fine,
Then in came Peiper Heidseek and handed him a glass of wine.
They welted the floor till they could be heard for miles around.
When Gallagher was in the air, his feet was never on the ground.
A fine lot of dancers you never set your eyes upon,
And those who couldn't dance at all were dancing with their slippers on.
Some danced jig step, door steps, and highland flings,
And Murphy took his penknife out and tried to cut a pigeon wing.
When the dance was over, Cassidy then told us
To join hands together and sing this good old chorus:

Should old acquaintance be forgot, wherever we may be,
Think of the good old times we had at the Irish Jubilee!