Brett - maybe you can impress the lads a bit more.

sandra


      When I Was A Boy
      Copyright 1997 by Frank Hayes, Firebird Arts & Music (BMI)

      When I was a boy our Nintendo
      Was carved from an old Apple tree
      And we used garden hose to connect it
      To our steam-powered color tv.
      But it still beat that ancient Atari
      'Cuz I almost went blind, don'tcha know,
      Playing Breakout and Pong on a video game
      Hooked up to our radio.

      And we walked twenty miles to the schoolhouse
      Barefoot, uphill both ways,
      Through blizzards in summer and winter
      Back in the good old days.
      Back when Fortran was not even Three-tran
      And the PC was only a toy
      And we did our computing by gaslight
      When I was a boy.

      When I was a boy all our networks
      Were for hauling in fish from the sea--
      Our bawd rate was eight bits an hour (and she was worth it!),
      And our IP address was just 3.
      And you kids who complain that the World Wide Web
      Is too slow oughtta cut out your bitchin',
      'Cuz when I was a boy every packet
      Was delivered by carrier pigeon

      And we walked twenty miles to the schoolhouse
      Barefoot, uphill both ways,
      Through blizzards in summer and winter
      Back in the good old days.
      Back when Fortran was not even Two-tran
      And the mainframe was only a toy
      And we did our computing by torchlight
      When I was a boy.

      When I was a boy our IS shop
      Built relational tables from wood,
      And we wrappered our data in oilcloth
      To preserve it the best that we could.
      And we carried our bits in a bucket,
      And our mainframe weighed 900 tons,
      And we programmed in ones and in zeros
      And sometimes we ran out of ones.

      And we walked twenty miles to the schoolhouse
      Barefoot, uphill both ways,
      Through blizzards in summer and winter
      Back in the good old days.
      Back when Fortran was not even One-tran
      And the abacus? Only a toy!
      And we did our computing in primordial darkness
      When I was a boy.