Many years ago, someone gave me a very wise insight. I am reminded of it often. "You get the life that you perceive." Let me give some examples:

My wife and I visit the sick whenever we can. One of the women we visit has MS. She was first taken down by the disease early in her marriage, about 30 years ago. When her husband realized that he would be faced with a lifetime of caring for her, he took off and was never seen again. For most of the last 30 years, the woman has been wheelchair bound. In the years that we've been visiting her, she has been in bed, and most recently is now confined to a hospital bed in a room in the basement of her home. Her sister has taken care of her all those years, and last year had surgery for cancer of her kidneys.
If you think it is depressing to visit them, you're delightfully mistaken. When we visit Lena, even though she can no longer get out of bed, and has very limited use of her arms and hands, she is always smiling. When we ask how she is doing, she always answers with a big smile. "Don't worry about me! I'm doing fine!" And the truth is, I think she IS doing fine. She perceives life as a gift and is thankful for the small blessings she has in her everyday life. I sometimes wonder if her husband who abandoned her has had such a positive life.

Lena is not unusual. Another woman we visit suddenly woke up one morning totally blind. I'd never even seen her wearing glasses. The blindness was irreversible, and after months of visiting specialists and many of us praying that she regain her sight, she accepted that it wasn't going to happen, and she started giving thanks for what she still has. You'd be hard-pressed to find a smile as radiant as Carrie's, and she gives so much, despite being in her 90's and too frail to walk without help.

Of course, there is the other side of the coin. A woman I know believes that no one has ever loved her, or ever will. Her pyschiatrist explained how she perceives life. Because she does not believe anyone can love her, any loving act is looked upon as deceitful and fraudulent. If people try to love her, she becomes increasingly abusive toward them until they finally get angry with her and her perception of herself and others is reinforced. She is driven to prove that no one can love her, and the greatest threat to her life is love. A great tragedy.

There are others who believe that everyone is prejudiced, so they see prejudice in acts where none exists. They're like the person who thinks that black people are offended when someone orders black coffee. Some see selfishness and egotism in the most sincere. loving, selfless acts of kindness.

If you perceive people as basically prejudiced, selfish and unloving you will live a life of suspicion, with feelings of being rejected and betrayed. And, no matter how much you are blessed with good health, financial comfort, and all the other things we seek, your life will be tainted by your perceptions. We all know people like that.

There are others who believe that there is a basic goodness in people, and that life is a gift, not an entitlement who can find joy in the most limited life. We see this all the time... a friend who just had his leg amputated just below the knee because of sugar diabetes. Since the surgery. he's twice lost his balance trying to use a walker and fallen on the stump, splitting it open. If you're feeling depressed, you should go visit him. You'll walk out of his hospital room spiritually lifted by just being in his presence.

I know you know people whose spirit has carried them through the hardest of times, and you've found inspiration in their hope. There are people in here like that, that I feel blessed to know.

Now, I'm going to lean back, kick off my shoes and enjoy what you have to add.

Jerry