My favourite was from Mike Elliott in N.East England.
He had taken quite a lot of banter from a drunk who probably, thought was adding a dimension to Mike's performance but everyone was sick to death of him.
Mike simply said " D'you know my friend, when God put teeth in your mouth - he ruined a perfectly good arsehole."
Game Set and Match.
Best wishes Mike if you ever look in - or, if someone is close to him please pass my Best Regards.