Discretion is the better part of Valerie
Though all of her is nice
Lips as warm as strawberries and eyes as cold as ice
You can tell by her demeanour that she keeps her love on ice
But you've lost your heart on her, now you'll have to pay the price
Not for her potatoes or puddings made of rice

Not for her potatoes or puddings made of rice
She takes carbohydrates like God takes advice
A surface(?) of ambition is her particular vice
Valerie fondles lovers like a mousetrap fondles mice

And though in the morning she may whisper 'It was nice.'


This is totally from memory so is probably not that accurate. I can remember another verse of which the first line was:

'Valerie is corruptible but known to be discreet'

and the last:

'Valerie rides a silver cloud where once she walked the street.'


It is definitely from 'Watchwords' by Roger McGough and I first heard it on a 1969 album called L the P by the Scaffold (Parlophone label, M.C. Esher's 'Ascent and Descent on the cover).

Hope I've at least provided clues or jogged some memories. Let me know.