You want blue tits? Fly over here and sit topless in the garden for an hour or two - I'll guarantee your tits will be seven shades of blue and purple in that time or less! It has turned decidedly chilly again, I know because Max the cat got into my nightshirt again this morning!

Either that, or he was a titspervert in a former life (Bridget Jones fans will know what I mean!)

LTS