The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #68879 Message #1163237
Posted By: InOBU
16-Apr-04 - 11:29 AM
Thread Name: Lyr Add: The oldest protest song (or song at all)
Subject: Lyr Add: The oldest protest song (or song at all)
This song was passed down in my family for about 65,000 years ... it tells of the coming of the Homo Sapiens to the Loire Valley in the year of Grummmpleshstien - named after a funny joke as numbers were not yet invented. The fact that this song comes down in my family and is of Neanderthal origins explains the prominent noses and weak chins in our clan. But, I think you'll enjoy it anyway. I present only the chorus in Neander, because few speak it today, but the translation almost captures the spirit or the oooooorrrrrrriptoshitz, as one would say in Loire Valley Neander.
Eieieieieinowhopgazzizile Pogerfiz wha hee wanker bastards
Neowniterp hapadinkhapadinkhapadingk dongerfutz
Mai, si vous oporongnlkjweropiugtoon youbetcha honk
Here they come again those narrow headed no brow wanker bastards (the oldest phrase in any language)
With their bivalve tools and their ugly assed kids who never seem to stop yelling,
How can we sleep, if you please, you loud mouthed gets
When you are napping flints from dusk to dawn.
Damn but it stinks these days!
Remember when we never heard of energetic thin heads?
Who'da thunk they'd procreate so fast...
When all their women are so thin and have no brow ridges!?
Hey! If they don't slow down they'll eat every damn Woolly Mammoth!
Who cares an unplanned poorly executed dump if they eat too many rhinoceroses
they're too tough anyway and not much use and remember when
Ummblic Sorophomani (Nora Jones) got trampled by one when she paused to admire her bum in a puddle of unusually clear Antelope piss?
Like I said, it really stinks these days!
Before you know it, just like Issmilamonany Furterbetz* , they'll go invent an atom bomb
and blow a new part in your hair, as well as blowing the Loire Valley out of France and into Englands back country (at this point everyone slams the person to the left on the knee with a rock) where it is so wet and cold you'll wish you never left Africa!
So, what the hey! If I had any forethought, and didn't mind getting my hands dirty
I'd tap one on the shoulder and advise him or her to go back to England or Germany or where ever the hell they make the wankers.
Oh ... and what about last Tuesday, mate?
* Issmilamonany Furterbetz - the inventor of the concept of the Atom Bomb ... once around tea ... which then consisted of a light broth of Antelope dung ... he sat up on his rock and said, "Hey guys, I we knap a flint in half, and in half again and in half again, a thousand times or so, until we get down to the littlest bugger of matter, and then all got together and whapped that at the same nanosecond ... damn but all hell would break loose! The neanders took away his hammerstone.
Hope you sing it in good health